My New Therapist

My new therapist is German, has lived in Switzerland for more than 20 years, is married to an American, and uses the F… word.

I like her.

She came recommended by my GP, when I mentioned, during one of several appointments last year (apparently, going to the doctor with diffuse symptoms on a regular basis can be a symptom of depression), that I was considering changing my therapist.

The thought of trying to find someone new and going through everything that had happened since my post natal depression once again had just felt too daunting earlier. But this day at my GP’s, I realised that the only benefit I had received from my weekly appointments the last two years was a very intense German conversation class (without the homework and discussions on finer grammatical points). My head wasn’t any clearer and I was still struggling with the same issues on a daily basis without having been given any tools to try and deal with them.

One of my friends, who’s also known to therapy, once told me she wanted to change her therapist. She explained that she found it difficult as she didn't want to upset her current therapist by leaving. At the time I didn’t understand her. To be honest, I thought she was being ridiculous. Now I’ve been in the same situation as her, I wish I hadn’t been so harsh on her and quick to judge. Because I totally agree with her sentiments about not wanting to hurt someone.

It IS silly, if you look at it logically. These therapists provide a service to you and if you’re not happy with that service, you should take your business (you) elsewhere. Most people would do that with their hairdresser, dentist, tattooist...

I’m so thrilled to have found someone who seems to ‘get’ me. She doesn’t agree with all my theories about why I might be feeling this way or that, but she gives me useful feedback and makes me think about why so and so and how so and so. (We're a lot more specific in our sessions.)

What I really appreciate about her is that she seems to care. Genuinely care. You leave her office with the feeling that she wants you to get better and not that you’re another patient (product) she should try to squeeze money out of for as long as possible.  

If you are in a similar situation and want to change your therapist, please don't make the mistake I did and wait too long. Had I not made the change in November last year, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have got the help I needed earlier this year. Or I would have got it when I was in a much worse mental (and physical) state.

It’s your mental health that’s at stake, and you deserve and need someone who’s right for you to help you get better.